If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed - to do this, simply click here. Thanks for visiting!

Oscar

Here is my cat, Oscar, in a very artistic shot - actually, if you get any closer he’ll have your hand off.

Like most cats, he appears to be the laziest bastard I have ever seen in my entire life. He spends his day either sleeping on a chair, sleeping on a bed, sleeping on a bag, sleeping on the ground or having a shit in the back garden. What a wonderful life he leads.

It makes you wonder what God was thinking when he decided cats should grace this Earth. I’ve come to the conclusion that they’re his way of saying "fuck it" to life in general.

I can just see our fat hairy furball in human form (bear with me on this one) - he’d be the equivalent of that guy who had to get lifted out of his bed on Jerry Springer by a crane a few years back. Actually, there’s a sad story about that guy in that he died a couple of years after appearing on the show. Don’t eat pies kids!

Getting back to cats, I have to say I like them. I wouldn’t want to be one myself, probably because the thought of licking my balls or anus is about as appealing as a very unappealing thing. They just have this amazing knack of being there when you’re a bit angry about something or, and this will make me sound like a right loony, feel like talking to someone.

I need to get a life.

Seriously.

Related posts